Nerima Life
by Wild Blue
Summary: Selfinsert The story of a boy who is dragged from his normal life with his family in Kyoto to the craziness of Nerima. How will he adjust? And what sort of story does he have to tell?


"Hey, blondie!"

In the junior high classroom, it was obvious to whom the comment was aimed. There was a sea of brown and black hair with the singular exception of one boy, an obvious foreigner who stood a head taller than the rest of the students with a head of dark blond hair. 'Blondie' turned to glare at the one who had spoken. "What do you want?"

The boy who had spoken was standing near the doorway, dressed in traditional kendo garb and with slicked back black hair. "Lady Midori wants to see you." The blonde could swear he saw little hearts in the boy's eyes as he said Midori's name.

There was a moment of silence. "And why does Midori want to see me so bad?"

The black haired boy shrugged. "She said something about a bet."

The blonde snorted. "I'm sure she did." He walked past the boy and out of the classroom. Class was over for the day and he had just been killing time. "I assume you'd want to be tagging along, Toshiro."

"Of course," Toshiro replied. "Somebody has to keep an eye on you, Konrad."

Konrad rolled his eyes. "Well, let's hurry up, then." He walked past Toshiro and took down the hallway, walking with long strides that Toshiro had to run a bit to keep up with.

The walk was long and boring, so Konrad tried to liven it up with conversation. "So who's going to take over the club captaincy next year when Midori leaves?" He didn't like dealing with Toshiro, but idle conversation couldn't hurt. They might not get along, but it's not like they were enemies, either.

Toshiro considered it a moment. "I dunno. I'll be leaving too, so I couldn't care less." He smiled. "All that matters is that Lady Midori takes over the high school kendo club captaincy."

Konrad rolled his eyes. Talk about a one-track mind. He turned his train of thoughts back onto the conversation. "Do you really think that a new high school is going to give a first year girl captaincy over one of its clubs?"

Toshiro clenched his fist, stopping to pose dramatically with his fist in the air. All that was missing was a dramatic wind and cherry blossoms. Maybe some dramatic music. "The fire of Lady Midori's spirit and the power of her sword will shatter any misconceptions that any man might hold! Her prowess could shatter a mountain and her will is as strong as the steel of any katana!"

While Toshiro was posing and making his speech, Konrad kept walking. Maybe he could ditch the nitwit while he was busy citing Midori's virtues.

Luck wasn't on his side, however, and Toshiro caught up with him before reaching the school's kendo dojo. "Don't ditch me like that!"

"Don't straggle behind, then," was Konrad's reply. As he reached the dojo, he flung open the door and walked inside, Toshiro on his heels.

The dojo was fairly empty. There were two pairs of students sparring with shinai while the club captain, a girl with shoulder-length black hair, looked over them. She turned and looked over when Konrad and Toshiro entered. "It's about time you showed up, Konrad!" She narrowed her eyes, but Konrad knew it was in jest. "What took you so long? Did you take the scenic route?"

"Oh, be quiet, Midori." Konrad walked over. "So what's this Toshiro was telling me about a bet?"

Midori feigned shock. "Don't you remember?"

The blonde raised an eyebrow. "If I did, would I ask?"

Toshiro growled. "Don't take that tone with Lady Midori!" He reached for a shinai.

As Konrad kicked Toshiro in the face, Midori explained. "You said you'd buy me whatever I wanted if I could get an A on my math exam, remember?"

"Something like that," Konrad replied, looking down at the swirl-eyed Toshiro. He looked back up. "Why?"

Midori was smiling broadly. "I aced it!" She gave a thumb's up.

The boy blinked a few moments. "You're kidding, right? You, the girl who had problems with simple subtraction, got an A on a math exam?"

Midori nodded, smiling broadly. "Yep! I got the results from our teacher early. She said I might give you some competition in high school next year!"

Now Konrad knew that was a lie. Like Midori could ever match him at math; it was his best subject! And he was no slouch in school, either. "Look, Midori..." He sighed. "It doesn't count if you cheat on the test."

He wondered when Midori had moved, looking up at her from the ground where her bokken had knocked him.

"You owe me a lamune, mister. La-mu-ne!" The girl brushed a lock of black hair over her shoulder. "Got it?"

"Lamune," Konrad repeated, standing up and rubbing his head. That bokken hurt. "Got it." At least she didn't ask for anything expensive. But, then again, she always found a way to coerce him into buying her a carbonated beverage, lamune being her favorite.

Midori smiled. "Good! Now that that's settled, you wanna go to my place and watch some anime? I'm pretty much done here, and I just got the new Tenchi tapes that came out."

The blonde nodded. "Sure, sounds good to me. Just don't take forever, I want to leave before Toshiro comes to." He jerked his thumb back at the boy who still lay on the ground.

"How hard did you kick him?" Midori asked. It usually took her two or three blows with her bokken to knock him for a loop like he did.

"Enough," was the reply. "Now hurry up!"

After Midori changed, the two left. Thankfully, Toshiro was still out of it as the two made their exit. They made their way out of the school and began the trek toward Midori's home. "You know, I'm going to miss that dojo," Midori lamented as she and Konrad walked down the streets of Kyoto.

"Too bad," Konrad said. "Tomorrow's going to be your last day to see it." That was the last day of the school year, after all.

"Don't remind me," Midori groaned. She sighed. "Leaving's going to suck."

Konrad shrugged. "It's only junior high. High school is going to be bigger and better. With more girls."

"Does that mean there'll be more guys?" Midori said jokingly.

"Probably," Konrad replied with a nod.

"Good. Then maybe I can net myself a boyfriend that isn't so... um..."

"Obsessive?" Konrad said, finishing Midori's sentence. "That seems to be the theme of all your boyfriends so far."

Midori frowned. "I think the word I was looking for was 'annoying,' though yours might be better." She had the worst luck with boyfriends. Just look at Toshiro; she had dated him for a week and he had never stopped obsessing over her.

As the two walked, they caught sight of a group of high schoolers, looking to the world like they were about to kill anything that looked at them wrong. They had the "tough punk kid" look down pat.

Konrad recognized one of them. "Yo!" He waved.

The shortest one in the group, a Japanese girl with shoulder-length flame red hair, looked over. She was the only girl in the group. "Yo, li'l bro! Midori! What's up?"

"Hiya Rin!" Midori greeted cheerfully.

"Hey, sis," Konrad said, greeting his older sister. He looked at the rest of the group. "Hey, um, other people."

The boys grunted.

"Nice vocabulary they have," Midori whispered in Konrad's ear.

Konrad laughed a bit, then turned back to his sister. "Hey, sis, I'm heading over to Midori's. I'll be back in time for dinner."

His sister waved a hand. "Whatever, you're a grown boy." She paused, looking away. Then, looking back at him, she said, "Mostly."

"Grown?" Midori jested. "When did this happen?"

"I dunno," Rin replied, "I just assume it did..."

Konrad narrowed his eyes. "Hardy har har." He snorted. "Come on, let's get going, Midori." He grabbed his friend by the wrist and began to drag her away.

"You can't escape the truth!" the redhead called to the retreating form of her brother.

)(o)(

Nerima Life 

Chapter 01: Change

)(o)(

Konrad was walking the short trek it took to get back to his home from Midori's house. He supposed his life was a good one. He had a loving, if somewhat dysfunctional, family. His best friend, Midori, lived nearby and was pretty much as good of a friend as he could ask for. He was about to enter high school with Midori, joining his older sister there. Yeah, life was good.

Unfortunately, things wouldn't be going as the boy expected.

"I'm home!" he announced loudly as he entered his home. He took off his shoes in the entryway and walked into the living room.

His father, a Japanese man with short black hair and a five o'clock shadow, was lying on the couch, watching the news as Konrad entered. "Yo," he greeted.

"Hey, dad." Konrad looked around. "Is Rin home yet?"

"She's up in her room," was the reply. "Go and get her, wouldja? I have an announcement to make to you both."

"An announcement? Sounds important." Konrad was curious, to say the least. His father usually didn't call them together to tell them something. It'd usually just wait until dinner.

"It is. Now go and get your sister."

Konrad grumbled as he went upstairs. "Couldn't it wait until dinner?" He was hungry. A growing boy needed priorities, after all.

Before he went to get his sister. He took a detour and went into his own room. He had been wearing his school uniform all day and he hated the bloody thing. He quickly changed out of it and into a more comfortable white button up shirt and black slacks.

He knocked on his sister's door after he was done. "Sis!" he called. He had to call loud; he could hear the music she was blasting outside of her door, and it was sure to sound even louder inside.

The music cut off and, after a few moments, the door opened to reveal his sister, clad in her usual black leather jacket. "Eh?" she asked. "What's up, li'l bro?"

"Dad wanted us downstairs." Konrad shrugged. "I dunno why."

Rin paused a moment, considering it. "Well, maybe he's going to announce your recent engagement!" She snapped her fingers. "That'd be just like him, too, to engage you without your consent."

Konrad froze. Engagement? That wasn't even funny. "Wh-what?"

Rin smiled, going along with it some more. "Sure! I mean, what else would he be telling us? I've seen him flipping through those matchmaker ads."

The blonde grimaced. "And why wouldn't he be engaging you?"

His sister smirked. "Simple. Because he knows I'd castrate any guy that tries to go out with me."

"No wonder you don't have a boyfriend," Konrad grumbled.

"Don't need one," Rin replied. "Now let's go downstairs so dad can engage you. It's the only way you'll ever get a girl, after all."

The boy grimaced some more as his sister walked past him. As he followed her, he said, "You're real funny, you know that? You should try for stand up comedy."

"Nah, I have better things to do than make some fools laugh at corny jokes." As they arrived in the living room, Rin announced, "We're here, dad!" She looked at her dad as he sat up from his lying position. "What's up?"

"If you say anything about arranged marriage, you're dead," Konrad advised.

Their father raised an eyebrow. "Okay, what are you talking about?"

Rin waved her hand dismissively. "Never you mind. Now what did you need us for?"

The man shook his head. He didn't understand those two some times. Nonetheless, he cleared his throat and began. "Well, you both know how I've been forced to teach math, despite being an English teacher, right?"

"Yeah, we know," his daughter replied. "You tell us eighty-million times a week."

"Possibly more," Konrad added.

"Sheesh, no need for the sarcasm," their father grumbled. "But anyway, the news is this. I finally got offered a position teaching English."

Konrad smiled broadly. "That's great! I know you've been waiting for that!" He was happy for his father.

Rin wasn't quite as happy. "There's more to this, isn't there?"

He nodded. "I'm afraid so." A sigh. "I'm afraid the position I've been offered is very far away. Tokyo, in the Nerima prefecture. We'll have to move."

Konrad was silent for a moment. "Move?" They were leaving? ...Wait... "Nerima? You're not talking about teaching at Furinkan, are you?"

"Oh?" Konrad's dad seemed surprised. "You know of it?"

"I've heard stories." Konrad's eyes shifted to the side. That was an understatement.

"I heard it was a good school."

Rin interjected. "It doesn't matter what some school's reputation is, dad, but couldn't you find a place closer to home?" She didn't like the thought of leaving all of her flunkies behind.

Konrad had to agree. "Yeah, dad. Wasn't there any place closer?" He did not want to leave behind his friends...

"Maybe," he answered. "But nothing close enough to avoid moving. And besides, the pay is really good."

Yeah. Konrad could see that as truth. And he would bet half of it was hazard pay. "Dad..."

"I don't like it, either, but we can't just live life by fearing the unknown or avoiding change." He usually didn't, but this was one time he had to put his foot down. "I've already found us a house and hired some movers to help us transport our stuff. I expect both of you to have your belongings packed up and ready to move by next Wednesday."

)(o)(

"This sucks," Rin said. She had just finished helping the movers pack up the last of the boxes. They closed the doors of the large moving van as she tried to catch a final glimpse of her stuff.

"Don't I know it," Konrad said with a sigh.

Midori was silent. She had shown up to help Konrad and his family move. It was like a second family to her, and she was watching them leave. "I'll miss you guys," she said, finally.

Konrad's father, who was leaning against the van, was the one to reply. "It's all right, Midori. There'll be plenty of chances to visit. I'll drive them up any time they want to visit you, all right?"

"Thanks, Mr. Kazuma," Midori said with a sad smile.

Rin thrust her hands into the pockets of her leather jacket. "Besides, we're just a phone call away. Distance doesn't matter with that, now does it?"

Mr. Kazuma looked at his watch. "Well, it's almost ten. I'm afraid we've got to be going if we want to have any of this stuff unpacked by tonight." He looked at his son's best friend. "Sorry to cut it short, Midori." He walked over to his car and got into the driver's seat.

Konrad looked down at the ground. "Well, I guess this is goodbye."

Rin elbowed him in the ribs. "Not goodbye." She looked over at Midori and waved. "See you later, okay?"

Konrad smiled as he and Rin walked over to their father's car. "Yeah. See you later, Midori."

Midori waved. "Yeah. See you later!"

"Shotgun," the redhead announced, leaping into the passenger seat.

"Damn it!" Konrad cursed. He grumbled as he took the back seat.

"Elder child privileges," Rin replied.

Before the blonde closed the door, however, he heard a voice. "Konrad Kazuma!" He looked back to see Midori pointing dramatically. "Don't forget! You still haven't gotten me that lamune you promised!"

Konrad smiled. Just like her to bring that up as he was leaving. "Yeah. I won't forget." He waved. "I'll be back, and then I'll get you that lamune!"

"Close your damn door," his father grumbled. "You can call her when we get to Tokyo and finish saying your stupid good byes then."

The door closed and the car began moving away from the city they had all grown up in, heading toward something new.

)(o)(

Konrad had his hands shoved in his pockets as he walked down the streets of Nerima. It was Thursday morning. He had woken up before either his sister or his dad, but instead of using his time constructively to unpack his belongings, he decided that a nice walk might clear his head.

Nerima wasn't too much different than he expected. A bit less crazy, perhaps, but, then again, he had only been exploring on foot for an hour or so. He had already found two places of interest; one was the school his father would be teaching at and he would be attending, Furinkan High, and the other was a small clinic offering a variety of services, set inside of a small white building.

He hadn't gone inside either of them, but he noted their location. Thankfully, both were close to his home... then again, maybe that was a bad thing. Nonetheless, he'd be keeping an eye on the two places.

Having explored the area around his home, he decided it'd be prudent to move a bit further away. He picked a random direction and began walking in it.

It wasn't long before he found a marketplace, open even in the morning. Venders were selling fresh produce by the roadside, harking their wares. Konrad found himself targeted by many a hales, crying out for the "foreigner" to take a look at some good Japanese produce. He responded with a shy smile and a wave, but didn't approach any of the venders.

He wondered exactly what he would do here in Nerima. He knew what was going to happen, but, to be honest, he didn't care. All he wanted was to be back in Kyoto, away from all of the eventual craziness and back in a place he was familiar with.

As he thought, he spotted a vender offering some oranges for sale. Remembering how much his sister loved citrus, the boy headed over to the seller.

"Ah, h-hello," the man said awkwardly in English.

Konrad rolled his eyes. "I'm Japanese," he said.

"Oh," the vendor said, sighing in relief. "Well, how can I help you?"

"I'd like two oranges," the boy replied. "How much?"

The man told Konrad the price and the boy reached into his back pocket, only to realize that he had left his wallet at home. "Jeez!" he cried. "I'm so stupid!" He turned to the vendor. "I'm very sorry, I seem to have forgotten my wallet." He began to turn away, embarrassed, but he stopped when somebody reached from behind him, handing a few bills to the vendor.

"There you go, that's for this young man's oranges," a soft, feminine voice said.

"Ah, Kasumi, that's very kind of you," the vendor said. He smiled at the person behind Konrad, then handed him two oranges. "Here you are, lad. Be sure to thank Miss Kasumi properly."

Kasumi? Konrad almost dropped the oranges he had been handed as he turned. Standing behind him was, indeed, a real-life Kasumi Tendo. She stood about the same height as him. Her long brown hair, modest dress, and shining smile all proved her identity.

Konrad took a few moments to regain his wits. After doing so, he spoke. "Ah, thank you." He bowed. "Thank you very much."

"It's no problem at all," Kasumi assured the boy. "I was just on my way home when I saw somebody new. I thought I would introduce myself and then I overheard your problem..." She smiled. "By the way, my name is Kasumi Tendo."

"Ah, my name's Konrad Kazuma." The blonde paused for a moment, considering how to continue. "I just moved here with my family from Kyoto."

"Just moved here?" Kasumi seemed genuinely interested. "And how are you liking Nerima so far?"

Konrad scratched his head. "Well, when I say 'just moved here,' I really mean it. We just got here yesterday and haven't even finished unpacking yet. I was just taking a walk before I get started unpacking today, and this is really the first time I've been out around town."

Kasumi was smiling. "Oh, well I'm sure you'll love it here. This really is a nice town."

"I'm sure it is," Konrad replied. Yeah, real sure. He smiled nonetheless. "Well, thank you for buying the oranges, but I'd better be going back. My sister will blow a gasket if I'm gone too long." She would, too. She might say that he can go out as long as he wants, but the fact was that she was a hypocrite; if he was gone too long without telling her anything, she'd get worried and angry. And an angry Rin was something to be avoided.

"Well, which direction do you live in?" Kasumi asked. "Maybe we're heading the same way." When Konrad motioned which direction, she smiled. "Oh, good! I'm going that way myself."

He smiled. "Well, then we can walk together part of the way, can't we?"

"That would be nice," Kasumi replied.

The two walked together, chatting about various things. Konrad learned about some things he already knew; Kasumi had a father and two younger sisters, for instance. Konrad, in turn, relayed some details about his own life. His father was a teacher, his older sister was scary, that sort of thing.

It wasn't long before they reached Konrad's house, a modest two-story home. "Ah, actually, this is where I live," the boy said, walking over to the door. "Thank you again for the oranges, Kasumi, and for the company on the way back. It was enjoyable."

"You, too," Kasumi replied with a smile.

As Konrad opened the door, he was immediately leapt upon by his older sister. "Konrad! Where were you? I was worried out of my mind! I thought you had been kidnapped by the yakuza!"

Kasumi continued to smile as she walked off. "What a nice boy. His sister seems very nice, too."

Apparently, she didn't hear the shouts of "Mercy!" wafting from the house.

)(o)(

The day came and went and the next one was mostly gone, as well. Friday afternoon was a time for people to be lazy, especially the Kazuma family. They were all three well versed in the fine art of laziness.

Rin was eating an orange, sitting at the dining room table, which barely had enough room to eat at with the large number of boxes sitting upon it. She ate happily. "So," she said between bites, "when does the school year begin here?"

"Oh, Monday," their father said nonchalantly. He was reclining on the couch. Good thing he had cleared room on it by moving everything to the table; he'd just die without his couch.

Konrad almost did a spit take with his glass of coke. "Wait, Monday? As in this Monday? As in three days from now Monday?"

"Yep, that Monday," his father replied.

The doorbell interrupted any other comments by the two children. "I'll get it," Rin offered, leaving the half finished orange on the table. She made her way out of the living room and into the hallway between it and the entrance.

Konrad sighed. "Man, this bites. I'm going to have to go to school so soon... ugh..."

The two men heard the door open and Rin greet somebody with trademark enthusiasm. The responding "Hello," perked Konrad's ears. It sounded like Kasumi.

Sure enough, Rin trotted back into the dining room, followed by Kasumi and a shorter girl with long dark hair. The new girl was, in Konrad's opinion, very cute. "Kasumi?" he asked. "And who is this? One of your younger sisters?"

"Yes," Kasumi replied with a smile, "this is my youngest sister, Akane." She paused. "Oh, my, I haven't introduced myself to your family." She bowed. "My name is Kasumi Tendo."

Akane took her sister's cue, smiling and bowing. "And I'm Akane Tendo. Nice to meet you."

"You didn't tell me you met some cute girl," Rin said, nudging her brother with her elbow. "I'm Rin, by the way. Rin Kazuma." She gave a wave to Akane and her elder sister.

Konrad gave a more formal bow toward Akane. "I'm Konrad Kazuma. I met your sister at the market yesterday."

Their father stood and bowed. "And I'm their father, Rokuro Kazuma."

"We came to welcome you to the neighborhood," the elder Tendo said with her omnipresent smile. She offered a basket full of what appeared to be food. "Please, take this."

Rokuro took the proffered foodstuff. "I'd be happy to." He began to walk back into the kitchen. "Would you two like to stay for dinner?"

Kasumi almost immediately responded. "Oh, no, I couldn't possibly trouble you like that."

"Oh, come now," Rokuro reprimanded, "it's no trouble at all." Leaving her no room for argument, he continued, "Konrad? Clear the table so we can have a place to eat." He left into the kitchen.

Konrad quickly and methodically ruined his father's hard work by moving all of the boxes from the table back onto the couch. "And done," he said cheerfully.

Akane took a seat at the table. "So are you two going to Furinkan?" she asked.

Konrad nodded as he took a seat. "Yeah. I'll be a first year, sis is a second year." He sighed. He wished he could be a first year back in Kyoto.

Rin took the seat she had previously vacated, going back to her orange. "Yep," she assented. "That's pretty much the size of it." She began to eat her citrus.

Kasumi smiled. "Well, that's nice. You'll be going to the same school as Akane and Nabiki."

"Nabiki?" Rin asked, wiping some juice off of her chin.

"My older sister," Akane replied. "She's older than me by one year. She'll be in the same grade as you." She looked over at Rin.

The redhead nodded, simply going back to her fruit.

There was a moment of awkward silence. It was broken by Kasumi. "Ah! I forgot. I need to call father and tell him Akane and I won't be back for dinner." She looked over to Konrad and Rin. "May I use your phone?"

"Go ahead," Rin responded. "It's right over there." She motioned toward the wall mounted telephone.

Konrad watched as Kasumi talked with her father. After a few moments, Kasumi hung up and turned back to the two Kazuma siblings. "Thank you," she said with a small bow.

"No problem," the two replied at once.

"I just wish dad would hurry up with the food," Rin lamented. "I'm hungry enough to eat a cow. Whole."

"Roast beef is delicious," Konrad agreed.

"And hamburgers!" Akane added with a smile.

"To hell with cooking it," the redhead replied, "I'll eat it raw."

Kasumi sighed. "You know that's not very good for you."

"Like I care!"

The other three laughed. Rin pouted. And food was eventually served, though it wasn't cow.

)(o)(

The meal was over and Kasumi and Akane had left. And since his father had cooked and his sister was a lazy bum, that meant Konrad was stuck dealing with the dishes. As usual.

Why couldn't he be the lazy bum for once?

"It looks like you made some nice friends already," Rokuro remarked from his position on the couch. He had brushed all the boxes off of the couch and onto the floor to make room for him to lie down upon his favorite piece of furniture. "See? I told you it wouldn't be so bad here."

"You say that now," Konrad mumbled under his breath. Wait until the loonies started showing. He didn't say any of that, of course. Out loud, he said, "Well, I suppose it could be worse." Well, it would worse in a few months. Maybe by then he could convince his dad to pack it up and go back to Kyoto.

"Don't forget to scrub really hard," Rin commented. "Get those dishes really clean!"

Konrad shot his sister a glare. "Why don't you help if you're so concerned, sis?"

Rin immediately stood up, stretching. "Well, I'm beat. Time for bed!" She beat a hasty retreat to her new room.

The blonde snorted. "I thought so." As he began the boring ritual of dish cleansing, he began to think about the last few days. Running into Kasumi had been a surprise, and she was just as kind as he would have thought. And Akane... he had always liked that girl. Always. And she got along well with him... well, she didn't immediately hate him, at least.

Maybe, just maybe, life in Nerima wouldn't be too bad.


End file.
